Is ANY School safe from a shooter?

"Did you hear that there has been ANOTHER SCHOOL SHOOTING?". It is beginning to roll off the tongue these days as easily as, "Did you see the sale at Macy's?"  However, the carnage that is created for the people involved lingers for much longer than the police investigation, I assure you.  And it is this phenomenon of de-sensitization that has occurred within both adults and children because of the frequency and severity of these occurrences that actually continues to lead to more.  Although it natural to ponder what we have learned from each individual occurrence and contemplate what we can do to stop it from happening again, what improved security measures can be implemented to assure parents that their children are safe, until we look at the ACTUAL cause of these tragedies, there is no safe situation. 

As a mother who has buried a child of my own, I relive my own loss every time I think of the parents who lose children through violence. Unfortunately, there is no quick and easy solution to stop another Sandy Hook, Columbine or Roswell New Mexico tragedy from happening. There is no magic security system or school safety plan that can be implemented to avoid this. Short of placing our children in armor-plated schools, sending them to school in bullet-proof garments from head to toe, or keeping them locked in our homes, we cannot prevent all such mass shootings.  

What we can do is look at why this tragedy happened and how it can be avoided in the future. It’s far more productive to ask why these shooters are so angry and why they seem to slip through the cracks in the system.. How has our society become so desensitized to violence and void of human emotion that a young person chose to prey on innocent children, apparently to garner some attention, improve his self-worth or make a statement?  

The answer is complicated and multi-leveled. Let’s start with death and carnage being packaged as entertainment in today’s society. I would imagine that even as the innocent children at a Sandy Hook were being executed, they were more confused than petrified. The scene unfolding before them may have closely resembled a violent movie or video game they had seen. Go sit through a violent movie that is popular with teenagers, and note their reactions to the gruesome scenes in the film. Instead of gasping and being shocked by the violence, there is laughter and applause.  

Not much is known about the motive behind the young Roswell shooter or the exact reason for the Newtown, CT massacre but, why should it surprise us when a mentally and socially disturbed young man, looking for attention and approval, or to seek revenge for his/her feelings of being wronged in some way re-creates a scene that would garner him applause and hero status among many of his peers? 

Until we can have an honest conversation about what the Founding Fathers intended in the First Amendment and realize what we are doing to the next generation, these incidents will continue to happen and will get worse. Just because someone has the legal right to produce something, doesn’t mean it should be produced and watched by our children.  

So what can we do as parents and society at large?   

1.  Send a message to the creators of violent media that it is unacceptable. Speak in a language that they will understand: money. Refuse to purchase violent video games, tickets for violent movies, music with violent and demeaning lyrics, or any other type of media that portrays violence as entertainment.

2.  Educate yourself on what is current in your child's world. We may not enjoy the music or videos today, but we owe it to our children to get involved and be aware of what they are being exposed to.   

3.  Start a dialogue with your child to ensure that they are empowered with the tools of assertiveness so that they will be able to say ‘no’ when pressured to participate in violent and inappropriate activity.  

4.  Begin a real dialogue with political leaders, community members, education professionals and parents about why society as a whole seems to be so full of rage and what outlets  and treatment options can be provided for people to expel their feelings in healthy and non-violent ways. 

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Christy Pace is a 23-year police veteran who can talk about what kids can do to stay safe on their way to and from school as well as bullying, teen drug and alcohol use, Internet and social networking safety, peer pressure and the need to fit in, and elder abuse and safety.