Add a Punchline to Our Cubs, Sox Island Cartoon

If you've got wit, add your punchline to Patch's weekly comic and win a personalized print.

Are you blessed with insight and good humor? Or just bored today? Share your wit with your south suburban neighbors by entering Patch's comic caption challenge. Just add your dialogue for today's comic in the comment section of this post. Our only requirement is that you keep it clean! At week's end, we'll pick the winning punchline based on how many of us here at Patch giggle and smile at your contribution. The user who produces the winning punchline will get a personalized proof of the comic, with the winning words and a credit line, from cartoonist Chuck Ingwersen and Patch. Congratulations to Lady Eagles #1 Fan with the winning caption to last week's Dog Interview cartoon:  I appreciate you allowing me to interview again. I hope you …

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Sox: Reason to Believe South Siders Will Contend

Depth in the starting rotation and power arms in the bullpen lend credence to the belief the Sox can contend in the AL Central. Patch Editor Ron Kremer outlines three reasons to keep your eyes on the Sox this summer.

The Sox open at home Monday (3:10 p.m.) vs. the Kansas City Royals. The game will be televised on Comcast SportsNet. The forecast calls for temperatures in the upper-30s. Snow flurries are possible.

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Carlton Fisk Lawyer Wants Judge to Strike Out DUI Evidence

The lawyer for White Sox legend Carlton Fisk filed motions to have evidence thrown out in the Hall of Famer's drunken driving case.

The lawyer for White Sox immortal Carlton Fisk is fighting to get the Hall of Famer's driver's license back and to have evidence ejected from his drunken driving case. Fisk, 64, lost his license when he allegedly refused to take a breathalyzer test during his arrest Oct. 22 on charges of driving under the influence, improper lane usage and illegal transportation of alcohol. But the Sox star had actually volunteered to take the blood-alcohol test, according to a petition filed Thursday by his attorney, Stephen White. White also filed a motion claiming the New Lenox police illegally arrested Fisk since there was "no reasonable suspicion of criminal activity" to give them cause to pull him over in the first place. Only Fisk wasn't pulled over…

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Sunday Comics

Sunday Comic: Hawk Harrelson Walks His Dog

Is the White Sox broadcaster's pooch as confused as the rest of us? Put it on the board … YES!

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Add the Punchline to Our White Sox and Cubs Cartoon

If you've got wit, add your punchline to Patch's weekly comic and win a personalized print.

Are you blessed with insight and good humor? Or just bored today? Share your wit with your south suburban neighbors by entering Patch's comic caption challenge. Just add your dialogue for today's comic in the comment section of this post. Our only requirement is that you keep it clean! At week's end, we'll pick the winning punchline based on how many of us here at Patch giggle and smile at your contribution. The user who produces the winning punchline will get a personalized proof of the comic, with the winning words and a credit line, from cartoonist Chuck Ingwersen and Patch. Congratulations to Heath Faubel, who provided the winning punchline to last week's squirrel comic: I was hoping these Groucho Marx glasses would cure my double …

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Southland Stories

If You Love the White Sox, You'll Enjoy This Story

Minnie Minoso's bat boy, a sex offender calls church home, a killer avoids the needle, angry parents protest school consolidation and a local woman ends up on "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant." Get a "Good Read on the Southland.

We've got the five most interesting stories in the south suburbs. If you read nothing else, read these. 1. Sox Memories to Envy: Imagine Billy Pierce checking your homework. Shaking Minnie Minoso's hand at home plate. Getting a standing ovation of your own in the White Sox clubhouse. Tom DePasquale, the longtime voice of the games at Rich Central High, doesn't need to imagine. He lived it as a White Sox batboy. 2. Homeless Sex Criminal Allowed to Register Church as His Residence: A local homeless shelter defends the decision to let a sex offender fulfill his registry requirement by saying the Oak Lawn church used for shelter is his home address. 3. Governor Commutes Paul Runge's Death Sentence to Life in Prison: Oak Forest native Paul …

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VIDEO: Ozzie Guillen to Students, ‘School is Your Job’

The White Sox manager spoke at High Point Elementary on Friday about not taking shortcuts, how he really feels about Jim Thome and the benefit of keeping TVs out of the bedroom.

Ozzie Guillen says he remembers when Midway Airport had one runway. The White Sox manager also recalls growing up in Venezuela with only one TV in the entire town. Once a week, the boys in his hometown of Ocumare del Tuy would watch wrestling on Saturdays. While Guillen's success in baseball now allows for several TVs in his home, he has decided to keep TVs and computers out of his children's bedrooms. "You have distance from family then," Guillen said, referring to when family members isolate themselves by watching TV and or using a computer. "You sit there in the room for hours and hours and hours. You don't enjoy going out, don't enjoy being with your parents. Always busy." Guillen's glib and direct use of words gets attention — almost …

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Sox Savvy

Sox Swan Songs for Paulie, A.J. and Bobby?

The White Sox closed the book on a 2010 season that essentially ended many weeks ago. Next comes an offseason that's rife with crucial questions.

In saying goodbye to the 2010 White Sox on Sunday, did Sox fans say goodbye for good to Paul Konerko, A.J. Pierzynski and Bobby Jenks? My guess — and my hope — is no, no and yes, respectively. Before the Sox beat Cleveland 6-5 to finish the season 88-74 and give Ozzie Guillen his 600th victory as manager, Kenny Williams praised Konerko for being "the classiest player that has put on a uniform." The Sox made a classy move of their own by sending Konerko out to the field alone  before the first pitch, allowing the crowd to give him one of several ovations he would receive on this melancholy day. There will, of course, be eager bidders for the services of Konerko, who hit .319 with 39 home runs and 111 RBI this season. And there's no doubt …

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VIDEO: White Sox Pitcher John Danks Visits Orland Park

Danks signs autographs for fans at Bettenhausen Chrysler Jeep on Sept. 11.

Michael Fioretti doesn't just come for an autograph. When White Sox pitcher John Danks stopped at Bettenhausen Chrysler Jeep in Orland Park last weekend, Fioretti stocked up on signed items. But not for his personal collection. Fioretti and his friends, who put together the Crosstown Classic Crawl, attend free signings with White Sox and Cubs players to collect as many autographed items as they can to later raffle off at the bar crawl, with all proceeds benefitting the Make a Wish Foundation.   Last year, the event raised enough money to send a boy to Cincinnati and spend a day with the Cincinnati Reds. "It's more than just the autograph," Fioretti said. "It's about making kids' wishes come true." Fioretti, of Lombard, was among 350 people…

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Sox Savvy

Why the Sox Aren't the Twins

As Minnesota swept away any remaining hopes for a playoff spot, Sox fans are left to ponder how it all went wrong.

Now that the Twins' open-air production of "Who's the Boss?" has ended its three-night run at the Cell, the Sox can begin sifting through the debris. Check that. The Sox still have some baseball games to play, as mandated by the MLB rulebook. So for now, it's up to the fandom to play the game of "Where did it all go wrong?" (No fair blaming everything on Joe West. Leave that for Hawk to do.) The better question is: Why are the Twins so much better than the Sox? It's a question that's been asked frequently in recent years. It's a question Ozzie Guillen desperately tried to answer before this season began. Didn't Ozzie try to shape the 2010 White Sox into something more Twins-like? There was the emphasis on speed and fundamentals, on …

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Chuck Ingwersen

11:43 pm on Sunday, September 19, 2010

Excellent point, Dan. I'm sure the Twins would trade all those playoff exits for a World Series title, too. Just like the Indians teams of the 1990s that won five straight AL Central titles but came away with no World Series rings.   more ›