Man Steals, Returns $2; DUI Suspect Buries Beer in Snow

A look at weird crime in the Chicago area.

By Emily Stone and David MacLean

Oops, your doppelganger is much wealthier

Police say a woman pulled into a Joliet parking lot and was changing out of her work clothes when there was a rap on her driver's side window. The woman rolled down her window and the knocker stuck a gun in her face and demanded her money. The woman gave the bandit $2, told him it was all she had and started to cry. She also showed him her empty wallet.

The gunman then returned the woman’s $2, apologized and told her he thought she was someone else before taking off.

In his defense, he thought the mole people were thirsty

Lake Forest police responded to a one car crash for a car that had driven off the road and into a ditch on Route 41. While officers were responding, cellular callers told dispatchers that the driver appeared to be burying something in the snow. An officer followed the driver’s footprints and discovered several empty beer bottles buried a short distance away, police said.

Man in Penalty Box penalized

The manager of the Penalty Box Bar & Grill in Plainfield was jailed for allegedly selling an undercover state agent a $100 Super Bowl square.

If someone steals a CD player from a vacant store does it make a sound?

Someone pilfered a pre-amplifier audio system with a CD player from a vacant store front in Highland Park.

Ah, the irony of the honest thief

A suspected thief who stole a computer from the an Evanston bar last fall turned himself in to police. He was identified when he attempted to pawn the computer and left his real name on the pawn ticket, police said.

Kids today with their expensive plumbing habits

An older man in Joliet answered a knock on his door and found a younger man there, who explained that there was a leak upstairs and asked to borrow a plunger, police said. When the older man moved to reach for something the younger man snatched his wallet and ran out.

Toni Prete February 08, 2014 at 09:28 AM
Is this a newspaper or a forum for a stand- up comic want-to-be? Crimes are not funny. Please just report the news.


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